It’s my Nan’s birthday today. She’s now missed two. She would have been 79 years old today. Normally, every year, I get excited by my Nan’s birthday. It marks exactly one week until mine. Last year, we were busy planning for her funeral on the 23rd and it was my wedding on my birthday last year. But this year feels different.
I’ve always struggled to buy a present for my Nan. It’s hard to buy for someone who has everything if you know what I mean. I used to think of practical things, like blankets, scarfs, a diary and things like that but I always felt pretty pathetic and that I could have done better. This year, we’re doing nothing to mark her birthday.
It’s just another day now. 7 days before my birthday. We don’t have a grave to visit or somewhere to leave flowers. It’s just the 21st September. This year it’s a Sunday. She will not be forgotten though. P1 thinks she’s having a party up in heaven. It’s not going to happen but I think it’d be wonderful if I was to go into labour and give birth today.
Happy 79th birthday Nan! You are still my biggest inspiration and I miss you more than ever.