No More?!

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We worked out that P1 has four nursery sessions left. That’s just two more weeks before the government funding finishes and I’ll be taking her out of nursery until she starts school in September.

I’m feeling really sad about the whole situation for several reasons. P1 has been going to the same nursery since she was 10months old. She wasn’t even sitting up when she first went. They’ve helped her to sit, crawl, stand, walk and talk! They’ve helped her to learn, to eat, to socialise and to be the little girl she is today. That’s a huge part of her life that’s about to be taken away.

I feel guilty for not wanting to pay for at least one session a week. But whilst I’m on maternity leave, I can be looking after her and not need to pay them. That’s my other worry… I’m going to have both girls alone three times a week, plus weekends. It may sound silly because it is my job as a parent to look after my children, but I’m terrified.

I’m scared I won’t be able to cope. I’m scared I won’t be able to entertain both of them enough. I’m scared I won’t be feeding her the right things and keeping a routine. I’m scared that I won’t be the best person to teach her to read and write. I’m scared we’ll argue. I’m scared I’ll become exhausted and take things out on my OH. I’m scared!

I know I’ve got to figure out a structured routine for us and stick to it if this is going to work. But routines and me just do not go together.

I desperately do not want to fail. Please leave me a comment and tell me what your routines are when you have all the children at home during the holidays/being a stay at home mum.

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